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Heart before head for today's business leaders
Liam Horan
TEN YEARS ago, says Roscommon man Kevin Kelly, if you mentioned you were thinking about bringing a motivational speaker into your company, the men in the white coats would be called for.
This has now changed dramatically, so much so that Kelly (38) now makes his living out of giving motivational talks to all sorts of groups through Ireland and beyond – companies, sales teams, groups of charity workers and volunteers.
In short, anyone who needs motivation, be it in generating more sales, learning how to listen better, or managing change.
There is no finishing school for motivational speakers in Ireland. Kelly knows some people scoff at the whole personal development notion – but he also sees his diary become busier as more and more people seek his services. He will even give the keynote address at the World Conference for Meeting Planners in Colorado in July, which will be attended by over 3000 planners.
He has that indefinable something. It’s probably his enthusiasm, the unapologetic way in which he goes about his business.
Kevin’s job is a sophisticated version of the team manager who rallies his charges. Through probing and prompting, he gets you to first identify your goals – and then sets about giving you the tools to go and achieve them.
It’s an abstract world, but his methods and results have been hailed by many who attend his seminars.
Patrick Griffin, a Regional Manager of Coca-Bottlers Irl Ltd, wrote after a recent session that “Kevin’s energy is contagious.” He said: "The workshop is a fast paced, interactive and thought-provoking session which empowers you to achieve both personal and business goals."
Patrick McKeown, MD of Asthma Care Ireland, described one of Kevin’s courses as “an excellent departure, straight from the heart, and appealing on all levels. The message is…circumstances, events and teachers will appear to help. The energy left me in no doubt but that we will hear a lot more of you.”
Kevin locks into the moment. He is also a great talker (as befits a motivational speaker!) We Irish are great talkers, though we are hewn from the side-of-the-mouth tradition – Kevin comes at you head-on.
He has written two books on personal development – How? When You Don’t Know How, and Life – A Trip Towards Trust. He also has an audio tape called Compelling Communication Strategies.
“I am a great believer in the power of intuition. I always choose wisdom before knowledge, and I encourage people to do the same,” he says.
“Knowledge tells us why we can’t do things. Intuition tells we can, and to try. If we cross-examine or analyse any of our intuitions too much, we will always generate enough reasons not to act.”
Kelly believes people act out of a position of fear far too often. They don’t even know why they are fearful – “the problem is not the problem, the problem is that invariably we don’t see the problem.”
He has devised what he calls a personal audit system to help “identify the problem.” He says: “I try to help people to identify their limiting beliefs, and they provide them with the tools to overcome them and move to a more empowering situation.
“The phrase ‘I am not good enough’ is the inner talk that haunts the masses. What I do at seminars is draw on stories from most people’s past to get them involved in some very unique experience, thereby giving them the resources to live a fulfilled, meaningful life.”
He has just recently pioneered a module for second-level schools here in Ireland, which so impressed entrepreneur extraordinaire Pat McDonagh, he of Supermac’s fame, that he sponsored it.
“I was at a course Kevin gave, and I was very impressed with it. We are sponsoring the Transition Year course because I think young people need to be given the self-confidence to deal with very pressurised times,” said McDonagh.
“They are faced with so many distractions and peer pressure that they need to have a belief in what they want to do. Transition Year is a great year if used properly, and Kevin’s course helps young people at a critical stage in their lives.”
Between 80 and 100 schools will take this module next year.
Kevin will soon visit Kenya working with an educational development charity called Suas. While in Kenya, he will train teachers in the slums of Nairobi in his Looking Ahead and Living Ahead programme.
A lot of people have bought his books. Over 13,000 went out of their way to buy How? When You Don’t Know How, and the figure is still climbing. And a lot of people have come to hear him speak, and many go away swearing he has helped them turn a corner in their lives.
“When you talk to a few hundred people, you don’t expect to please them all. Remember people come to your course from different stages of their development. To appeal to all would be beyond miracle working. All you can do is deliver from the heart and detach from the outcome,” he says. It is this philosophy that sustains him when he sees an audience member’s face glaze over, or if a yawn goes heroically unsuppressed.
Fuji recently had him speak on The Power of Focus. His upcoming diary includes talks on Rapport Excellence and Personal Auditing.
“People sometimes wonder what qualifies me to talk on motivation. Well, what makes an authority? Someone who truly embraces the philosophy. Someone who has set lofty goals, took serious risks, learned from their failures. It is easy to talk about it, not so easy to live it,” he says.
“I like bringing people out of their comfort zones. If you want to change anything in you life, you must make this journey anyway.”
His talks, some of which go on for hours, are riotous occasions. Eyes dancing in his head, he somehow holds onto the structure of what he is trying to do – but only just. There is the permanent possibility of his going off on a tangent from which he might never return – but he always does.
Because behind the apparent chaos, he always has a clear idea of what he is trying to do. The chaos is arguably a product of his assiduous planning: by knowing where he wants to go, he is able to let go of the reins quite a bit, safe in the knowledge that he will return to the core aspects he had planned and prepared for.
Much of the meat of his talks come from his own life. Inspirational people he has met over many years of travelling the world. He fell from high income in the business world to low income in the motivational speaking world – and came out the other side. He carries around a set of audited accounts from his first years as a motivational speaker which prove that this guy knows the lower reaches.
“I focus on contributing positively to the world we live in,” he says, and those ‘coincidences’ just happen to come along. Ergo, when he resolved to write a best-seller, out of the blue appeared a motley crew of editors, designers, and others who could help him on his way.
Again, there is nothing earth-shattering – no miracle escape from terminal illness, or anything – but he parcels them together in a meaningful way, and they are possibly all the more convincing for ‘ordinary people’ because they are the stories of an ‘ordinary person.’
* Further details on Kevin Kelly on www.kevinkellyunlimited.com
Posted by Kevin Kelly at 09:57 AM | Comments (0)
"To succeed, jump as quickly at opportunities as you do at conclusions."
Benjamin Franklin
Posted by Kevin Kelly at 10:40 AM | Comments (0)
Follow your mission and allow your intuition to be your guide.
In my own life embracing this strategy delivered the following results:
A Soulmate.
A Best Selling book.
The most challenging interviews around the world secured by doing nothing!
The biggest contracts.
A life full of magic and adventure.
The message - start making your own luck today.
Posted by Kevin Kelly at 12:24 PM | Comments (0)
In 1988 John Woods was scheduled to be on the Pan Am flight that exploded over Lockerbie but cancelled at the last minute choosing to attend an
office party instead.
In 1993 he was on the 39th floor of the World Trade centre when it was
bombed - escaped without injury.
In 2001 he left his office in one of the Twin towers just before the
building was struck.
Amazing but true.
Luck or what?
I believe what! Regular visitors to my site will understand why I say
this.
You make your own luck.
Posted by Kevin Kelly at 05:07 PM | Comments (0)
"...only a fool does not seek to understand why he or she makes the mistakes they make."
Ex President Bill Clinton in an interview with Time magazine 28/06/2004
Posted by Kevin Kelly at 11:17 AM | Comments (0)
Success is not the key to happiness. Happiness is the key to success. If you love what you are doing, you will be successful.
~ Albert Schweitzer ~
and financially fulfilled.
Posted by Kevin Kelly at 11:31 AM | Comments (1)
Researchers of The Society for Research in Child Development at the University of Michigan have revealed that a child's relationship with his or her peers is largely dependant on self belief or worth.
The researchers studied 605 fifth and sixth graders over a period of a year, and found that children who didn't think they deserved their peers' attention and respect, and who felt socially ineffective, were more likely to withdraw from activities with other children and be easily discouraged when facing social challenges, such as resolving disagreements or trying to make new friends.
Such kids, the researchers said remained isolated, had few opportunities for developing friendships and experienced teasing and victimization from their peers.
These adverse social experiences, in turn, led them to develop even more negative views of their social self worth, and to further withdraw from their peers in a self-perpetuating negative pattern.
What about adult relationships?
Do they follow this pattern?
Does low self esteem stop us from meeting our soulmate?
Does it stop us from going for that dream job?
Does it stop us from getting that promotion?
Does it stop us from being appreciate and getting the best out of our subordinates in companies?
Does it cause us to bully or harass our co- workers?
Does it stop us from creating an environment in which our children can thrive?
Yes - Yes- Yes
The message is simple - work on yourself, you will begin to see the world with different eyes.
and the Monday morning warning - remember people like each other that are like each other.
Posted by Kevin Kelly at 09:13 AM | Comments (0)
"If a blind man leads a blind man, both will fall into the ditch."
Anonymous
Posted by Kevin Kelly at 11:51 AM | Comments (0)
Judging on how my own life has unravelled over the last few years, I believe that when you are doing what you love, you experience abundance; ie whenever you are needy help arrives.
I also believe that the true unconditional givers in the world also experience abundance in their life.
One of these people, a very close relation of mine, had an extraordinary experience this week. As normal, she handed in her 5 4 3 2 1 lotto numbers on a sheet to the customer service representative. However, they managed instead of giving her back confirmation of her three nominated numbers, the machine printed out a sheet with four numbers!
Yes, you guessed it - the four numbers came up. Instead of winning €321 she won €4321.
Furthermore, winning isnt a rare event for this woman, it appears that the lady in question cannot but win when she plays any game of chance.
Is it a case of the more you give, the more you get?
Is it a case of respecting money for what it is , energy that goes around?
Do you find it easy to give?
Posted by Kevin Kelly at 11:08 AM | Comments (0)
I just stumbled across some very interesting research this morning. At my seminars it is not unusual for a sidebar discussion to arise over the merit/ demerits of leaving a dysfunctional relationship, but more importantly the potential negative effect on the children.
As children are very much people who model off what parents do as opposed to what they say, I have always believed that if the relationship is toxic, children are at minimum not benefiting from this environment.
If on the other hand the parents truly loved the child and were committed to having a positive input in their lives after a separation, this could benefit the child more.
A new study by Victoria University sheds some light on the subject
In a project for the Ministry of Social Development, researchers from Victoria's Roy McKenzie Centre for the Study of Families interviewed 100 stepfamilies with children between the ages of nine and 13 to explore how relationships within stepfamilies affect the well-being of the children in them.
Each relationship was assessed by the child, his or her resident parent, non-resident parent, and stepparent.
Centre Director, Associate Professor Jan Pryor, says the study found children’s relationships with their stepparents and non-resident parents are much more important than previously thought and not only affect their relationship with the parent they live with but also their own behaviour, self esteem and happiness.
The quality of these relationships was also linked with the quality of family life in their stepfamilies.
"The research indicates that children’s relationships with their parents and stepparents are interrelated. If a child feels close to their non-resident parent, then they are likely to feel close to their resident parent and their stepparent as well," she says.
"This suggests that stepparents and non-resident parents need not feel in competition with each other. If a child as a good relationship with one adult then they are likely to have good relationships with all three."
Though the sample is small, these are still very interesting findings.
Posted by Kevin Kelly at 09:42 AM | Comments (0)
Do you find it difficult to get a good parking spot?
Have you ever tried to mentally booking a parking space in advance of reaching your destination?
Why not give it a try the next time – with belief in your heart you may be surprised at the outcome.
Wakey, Wakey!
Do you use an alarm or are you confident in your ability to wake up at the right time everytime?
Your internal clock is probably the most reliable option.
This opinion is not in the main shared by business travellers surveyed by Harris Interactive for Crown Plaza Hotels and Resorts.
They found that only 7% choose the natural option! Most people opted for an alarm clock or wake up call from the hotel.
On time!
Is it possible to turn up for appointments on time every time even on occasions where the clock says you are late?
Tap into the power of your mind and you will execute all of the above tasks with effortless ease.
Posted by Kevin Kelly at 08:37 AM | Comments (0)
The only failure in life is the failure to learn from failure.
Failure followed by feedback brings you closer to your goal.
Dreams without setbacks are like a garden without any weeds - very
unlikely.
Posted by Kevin Kelly at 11:33 AM | Comments (0)
Do a job you love, and you will never work a day in your life.
Immersing in a job you love allows you to experience flow - the work is completed with effortless ease, and a minimum of stress.
When you are doing what you love, you will also enjoy provision - that is, you will be rewarded sufficiently to do what you wish in all aspects of your life.
Regulars visitors to the site will have seen these messages repeated over and over again - now a new study conducted by researchers at the University of Amsterdam and the Australian National University sheds more light on the link between work and happiness.
Research has found that most people require massive pay hikes to become happier, while those with a cheery disposition are more likely to earn more money than their less positive colleagues.
Indeed, their findings indicate the average individual out of the 7,500 studies would require an 800,000% increase in pay to gain just a slight degree of additional happiness.
Instead, those who are already happier are more likely to see their incomes rise and also find it easier to find a partner.
Your goal - to discover your life's purpose - engage in a job you love - and enjoy the positive effects it has in all aspects of your life.
Posted by Kevin Kelly at 10:30 AM | Comments (0)
One sees problem, the other challenge.
One sees challenge, the other opportunity.
One experiences pain and grows, the other withers and dies.
One childs wants to be a football star, the other a suicide bomber:
"It's better than being a singer or a footballer."
Hussam Abdo, 15- year-old Palestinian, on why he tried to become a suicide bomber in March. Israeli soldiers talked Abdo into removing the 8kg of explosives he had strapped to his chest.
How do you see the world?
Is it truly serving you?
Is it time for a new way of thinking?
Posted by Kevin Kelly at 10:20 AM | Comments (0)